The things we say

I heard a story of a man who spread falsehoods and slandered the name of a wise man in his town. The man who spread the falsehoods decided to go to the wise mans home and ask forgiveness. The wise man, knowing that the man couldn't possibly understand the gravity of what he had done, told him to go to his home and cut a feather pillow and let the feathers blow in the wind. Then come back and see me. He did so and came back to the wise mans home.

"Did you do as I said?" asked the wise man

"yes, am I forgiven now?" answered the man.

"Just one more thing, now go gather all the feathers that came out of the pillow." said the wise man.

The man then insisted that it would be impossible to gather all of the feathers, the wind had scattered them everywhere. The wise man then told the man that even though he wanted to take back everything he had said, the damage had been done and it was impossible, just like it was impossible to gather all the feathers.

When we're placed in a situation where we're tempted to say something about someone, remember three things that are tried and true:

#1-Is it true?

#2-Is it necessary?

#3-Is it kind?

Of course even if we know something is true about someone, we don't always need to share it. Is telling someone else something you've heard about an individual a kind thing to do? Not usually, unless, it is necessary. What if they need help? Probably the most important one in general is #3. Remember Thumper from the Disney show "Bambi", when his mother scolds him for what he says to Bambi. She asks him to repeat what it is his father told him. And he says, "if you can't say somethin nice, don't say nothin at all"

I'm not perfect at this by any means, but my mom reminded me of these three rules, and I felt like it would be an important thing to share today. We all need a reminder. So the next time an opportunity to share information you know about someone comes up, think to yourself.... if I tell what I know, is it true? is it necessary? is it kind? and then just smile instead. Love, Joy